...Adam?

So I guess I should talk about what I thought of the movie, Adam. I'm not gonna explain about the gist of the movie anymore.

Aw, what the hell...why not one more time? (I'll even give you a link to the trailer)

It's about a guy with Asperger Syndrome who lives in a flat in NYC. Then, a cute female teacher/writer moves into the same building. She's a NeuroTypical, or NT. They bump into each other, start talking, romance ensues.

It was an okay movie overall. The pacing was choppy, but the acting was convincing. The cinematography was nice. I like when movies set in NYC make the city seem small and cozy, when we all know that it really isn't.

I really liked the clothes that the two main characters wore. I don't know why I feel compelled to mention that...

Let's see--the plot was a bit contrived and at times it seemed like an infomercial as most of the characters didn't know what AS is, exactly, and there were a lot of explanations that seemed forced. I mean, I guess that's how most people are, in reality. Can't blame you all, I mean--my gosh--I'd heard the term "Asperger" once in my whole life before I even realized I had it.

I don't want to give away too many spoilers for my friends who haven't seen the film yet. But then again, there are lots of people who will never see it and I don't blame them. It seems like a film that only Aspies or NT's who happen to love an Aspie would be interested in seeing.

Let me just say that, in my opinion, the writers/actors went a bit overboard with the main character's display of Aspie symptoms. That's just my own opinion, though, based on my own experience. Yes, I have real difficulty with looking people in the eye, but I don't want to believe that it looks as awkward as it did in the movie. I suppose it probably does. I don't have trouble going out to restaurants, though, at least when I'm with someone else. I don't eat the same thing every day. I can tell when someone else is sad or tired or angry. Well...truthfully, I can tell when something isn't right with another person. But, like Adam, I don't always know what to do. I don't know if a hug is appropriate or if someone just wants to vent. I don't know when a hug is too much. And anyway, to be honest, I don't much like to receive hugs or pats on the head or things like that. I'm touch sensitive. That means I really, really don't like to be touched unless I'm VERY close to a person. I do get really uncomfortable at parties and at the mall etc. But that's actually because I'm noise sensitive, too. Crowds of people sound like a buzzing beehive to me and it actually hurts my ears and upsets me. But I have learned to just deal with it most of the time, I make a face and wrinkle my nose, but I keep doing whatever I'm supposed to be doing because the world doesn't stop just because I am uncomfortable.

I do have a problem with talking on and on about my "special interest". Most of the time that would be LOST. Thank God for all the people I've met online that also love LOST. I would have driven my husband insane if it wasn't for you all. He's so sick of LOST now. It's sad. He used to love that show. I have also learned to just be quiet most of the time instead of boring people. I can't tell when people are sick of hearing me talk about something, so I just don't say anything at all. That scene with Adam having lunch outside with his friend, he keeps going on and on about astronomy and his friend stops him at least twice to change the subject but Adam doesn't get it or doesn't care. My husband nudged me during that scene. Yeah, jackass, I get it.

Don't ever ask me about Eclipses again, 'cause whatever I know, I'm not gonna tell ya!

Oh...eclipses are another thing I obsess about. See a previous blog if you want to know about all my other strange obsessions...

Another problem I have with this movie is that the climax is basically Adam finding out that his girlfriend lied to him about something really trivial and he throws a fullblown dragout hissy fit. I don't do that either. I don't get that angry when people lie to me, because I just expect people to lie. It's what we do.

I think what bugs me the most is that:

the movie implied that all Aspies tend to be atheists, that we never show emotions, that we can never have a solid relationship with an NT, that we can never really empathize with others, that we don't fit in and never will and that we're all tragedies that will never truly be happy. Some of the things that Adam did--yes, I can say I have done things like that (hit myself/hurt myself, get so frustrated that I cry, throw a fit and destroy another's property)...WHEN I WAS A LITTLE KID. But Adam is 29. I'm also 29. I don't throw fits any more. I don't destroy other people's things 'cause I'm upset. I don't hit my head against the wall or try to cut myself any more. I'm probably a bit too outspoken, but I try my hardest not to be a rude jerk. I don't cry much, but it happens. When my cousin was killed in the line of duty, and I attended his funeral, I stood there bawling like a baby. I don't even know what came over me. It just happened. I'm happily married to an NT and we have trouble communicating sometimes, but I love him and he loves me. And I try really hard to show that I love him, I don't want to seem as cold as they made Adam seem. I can survive on my own, I did for a while. It was hard, but I did it. I just don't want people to get scared about this portrayal of a person with AS, and imagine that we are all so unreliable or immature or temperamental.

Some of us really just want to fit in and understand the NT mind, the way it works, how you live and think and feel. Not that I necessarily want to change who and what I am, but we could all just try to understand and appreciate each other.



One last thing....seeing Adam in that Space suit really made me want to buy a DHARMA jumpsuit and wear it around the house. Just for...ya know...cleanin' and whatnot. ;)

Disappointing Zombies

So I'm sitting in front of the pc late at night, yet again, unable to sleep. I guess I'll just write whatever pops into my head...

I had to admit to John that I've been holding in a lot of stress lately. He asked whether it was stress or excitement. I guess they're both the same when it comes to me.

Tomorrow we jet over to Austin (and I mean that literally) in the early evening to see a movie that looks really promising. It's called "Adam" and it's about a man with Asperger Syndrome who falls for his neurotypical neighbor. The trailer made me laugh & cry at the same time, which is quite impressive, as almost nothing makes me laugh or cry and for it to have me doing both at once was a bit of a shock, even for me. I don't know if people believe me when I say that I almost never cry. I guess only the people who really know me well can say that it's true. My family has been around me during the worst of times and they know for sure, even when someone I love was in very bad shape, I had to keep it together for my mom & son. I assume they thought I was just being strong. No. I'm not strong. I just can't express myself the way others can. I can't make myself cry. I can't bring myself to do it most of the time.

Anyway...we're going to this movie and we have to rush to the airport, hope the plane's on time, rush to the theater, rush to the hotel. Rush again the next morning to an early flight back home, rush to work, rush rush rush...

It's exciting but draining. There are other things that are making me a bit panicky besides just that. I'm getting in touch with old friends I haven't seen in a while, it's disrupting my pattern and that is upsetting to me, even though I am pleased to see & hear from old friends. I'm taking a trip this October, to Mexico for a weekend. That's going to be fun, but again, stressful/exciting.

Writing is stressful, because in my stories I have to meet new people. That might sound weird but that's how it feels to me. All these new people running around in my head, making demands, saying things over and over again until I get it down on paper. They will be heard.

And then next month I turn 30! Ugh, where did the last ten years of my life go? Seriously...

I guess all of this is why I have been escaping into manga lately. I need these other worlds, to get away from my own for a while. I am still so happy to have met every wonderful person in the Fruits Basket universe. I'm now on book 12 and I know it's almost over. That actually might just be enough to make me cry. I always want to cry when something wonderful ends. It's natural. Usually, I just hide the tears inside, but sometimes I am overwhelmed by a good story and those tears leak out. I am overcome. I find myself doing that a lot with Furuba. I love those Sohmas, and Tohru and her friends and even Megumi. Even those idiots in the Yuki Sohma fanclub warm my heart. Someday I want to meet (Natsuki) Takaya-Sensei. I feel like it's something I have to do. And I have to say, she's inspired me so much.

I guess the reason I titled this blog "disappointing zombies" is because another manga I started reading was about zombies. The first volume was so great, very promising. The premise was interesting, the setting was satisfyingly gothic and the two lead male characters were rather sexy. The girl lead was easy to identify with as she was mousy and small and meek, but she too had promise. Zombie-Loan by Peach-Pit was as big a disappointment to me as Furuba was a pleasant surprise. The first volume was well written, had a plot that made sense and the end was fitting. The ride was smooth from the beginning and the end was exactly where you wanted to go. The second volume quickly lost my interest because it seemed like the writers kept jumping around from place to place without having the characters really do much. Plus, the mystery & the crime they were solving was not interesting. Then they introduced two more female characters who seemed to have no purpose except to distract the main female character, sometimes by being unnecessarily vulgar and/or cryptic. Okay, let's just say that Yomi is a nasty whore and I don't like her. I get that she likes girls, but does that mean she has to be such a slut? She practically rapes Michiru...ugh, spoiler-tastic, I know. That's all I'm gonna say. I think I wanted Akatsuki-san to be another version of Kyo Sohma from Furuba. Oh, my...



How I love Kyo Sohma. ::sigh:: He is indeed, a fabulous monster...


I'm really gonna get off track if I keep goin' down that road. Ooh! That reminds me...in Furuba Vol. 11, there's another LOST reference. Oh yeah...

"Did you...open the box?"

How could I not think of Leonard from Santa Rosa, yelling at Hurley in Season 1's Numbers, "You opened the box!"




Hey, Darlton...WE STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT BOX!

Sorry...had to get that off my chest, so to speak!

Back to manga. Those zombies were quite the disappointment. I was really hoping this series would be good. I love zombies. LOVE THEM. I wish someone would write a Twilight-like series of books only with zombies. I was really hoping Zombie-Loan would be IT. But sadly, no. I keep waiting. I'll probably keep watching the anime online though (and for free, of course). The series seems to work better as an anime.

I tossed vol. 2 of Z-L on the floor and went to the bookstore (for more Furuba) and whilst there I found another interesting manga, Blank Slate. I was just captivated by the sexy, androgynous character on the cover. I had to read this book.



Plus, the title, another LOST reference (Tabula Rasa, y'all). Halfway through the book, I'm really digging it. The main character, Zen, has depth and an unexpected gallantry about him. I hope he gets back together with the blind girl. Their little tryst was very interesting to me, as you don't really see that kind of pairing, without the plot becoming infested with treacle. That one's by Aya Kanno.

I also found some anime here online called Xam'd. I'm gonna watch the first episode now, see if I like it.

So till next time, to ease my frayed nerves, if anyone knows any good zombie manga or zombie anything for that matter...let me know, 'k?